JUNE 26, 1937

Full News Archive

• Headline: Cape Cod Watch Plant Relocation. Impact: The relocation of this factory inspired a long line of nostalgic hipsters to start buying vintage watches, leading to a trend where everyone suddenly thinks they're a watchmaker. Spoiler alert: they’re not. Fact: This factory move is one of the first examples of a 'pop-up' museum. The only thing missing is artisanal coffee and a food truck outside.
• Headline: Seversky Plane's Daring 15,000-Foot Dive. Impact: Jimmy Taylor’s death-defying dive not only advanced aviation technology but also gave birth to the phrase 'Hold my drink' as future pilots pushed the limits of what was possible, often to disastrous results. Fact: This plane's survival is a testament to engineering resilience. Not to be confused with the resilience of the pilot's bladder after that dive!.
• Headline: MAYOR PENALIZES BOARD FOR A QUIP; Orders It to Meet Weekly Summer After Recess Is 'Protested' by Brunner VACATIONS ARE DISRUPTED All Members Are Required to Be on Hand to Attend Friday Sessions. Impact: This mayor's decision led to the establishment of 'mandatory fun' policies in local governments everywhere, ensuring that vacation time is just a suggestion. Fact: Because nothing says 'public service' like ruining everyone’s summer plans in the name of bureaucracy!.
• Headline: Named to Buffalo Faculty. Impact: This innocuous appointment contributed to the long-standing tradition of universities hiring someone just because they can, leading to the eventual rise of the 'Professor of Meme Studies'. Fact: The University of Buffalo has since become a hub for groundbreaking research—mostly in the art of avoiding real work.
• Headline: MRS. LEONARD GOW; Widow of Shipping Firm Partner Is Dead in Scotland. Impact: Mrs. Gow’s passing marked the end of an era for her shipping firm, leading to a series of unfortunate events that would eventually inspire a bestselling novel about mismanaged estates and poorly executed wills. Fact: In history, the death of influential women often gets overshadowed by their husbands. But here’s to Mrs. Gow—who probably had the better ideas!.
• Headline: WILLIAMS INJURIES FATAL; Montclair Manufacturer Dies After Indiana Motor Crash. Impact: The tragic death of this manufacturer sparked a series of reforms in automotive safety standards, leading to the modern seatbelt—because nothing says 'we care' like forcing people to wear a strap when they drive. Fact: Williams’ story is a reminder that even in the fast-paced world of manufacturing, life can take a sharp turn—literally.
• Headline: KILLERS OF G-MAN DOOMED TO GALLOWS; Suhay and Applegate, New York Ex-Convicts, Found Guilty by Federal Jury at Topeka. Impact: The conviction of these two ex-convicts led to a more aggressive approach to federal crime, which eventually inspired countless TV shows and movies about the heroic FBI agents who catch the bad guys—because what’s more entertaining than real life?. Fact: This trial was a pivotal moment in American crime history, showing that even the most inept criminals can become infamous.
• Headline: ELIZABETH N. FORD MARRIED AT COLUMBIA; Ceremony in St. Paul's Chapel on Campus for Her and John Joseph Lippoth. Impact: This nuptial marked the beginning of a legacy of Columbia alumni who thought getting married on campus would boost their careers—spoiler alert: it usually doesn’t. Fact: Campus weddings were all the rage, mostly because they were cheap and involved less travel. Who knew love could be so budget-friendly?.
• Headline: Pommand II Wins at Auteuil. Impact: The victory of Pommand II not only thrilled horse racing enthusiasts but led to a rise in betting among the masses, which eventually paved the way for that one uncle who always loses at poker nights. Fact: Horse racing is the one sport where horses get more credit than the jockeys—because who really cares about the humans when there are magnificent beasts involved?.