MARCH 13, 1937

Full News Archive

• Headline: Lily Pons Becomes Auto Inspector. Impact: Lily Pons becoming an auto inspector led to an unprecedented rise in people demanding gold badges for literally anything. We now have badges for dog walking, coffee brewing, and even couch sitting – all thanks to her.. Fact: Did you know that auto inspectors could once be mistaken for superheroes? They had the power to save your life – or at least your car – and that’s almost the same thing!.
• Headline: Desperation Leads to Collapse Outside Office. Impact: This woman's tragic collapse outside the mayor's office set off a chain reaction of public outcry that eventually led to a sitcom about city officials who are completely out of touch with the struggles of everyday citizens. Spoiler alert: it wasn't funny.. Fact: It's ironic how a woman fighting for her rights ended up being a footnote in history, while the mayor probably spent the day avoiding questions about potholes..
• Headline: Opera Opens Drive on Scalpers Who Sell Tickets on Sidewalks; Hires Guard to Rout Speculators and Even Considers Barring Patrons Who Buy From Them-Finds Curbstone Dealers Most Numerous Since the Depression. Impact: The crackdown on ticket scalpers led to a whole new underground economy of ticket counterfeiters who, in a twist of fate, ended up creating the world of online ticket reselling. Cheers to progress!. Fact: Did you know that scalping tickets was once the only way to get into a sold-out show? Now, it’s the only way to get a ticket at a reasonable price – who knew we’d end up right back where we started?.
• Headline: DIMAGGIO AGREES TO RUPPERT TERMS; Report Is That He Will Get $17,000 or More for Work in Yankee Outfield OPENING EXHIBITION TODAY Sundra, Wicker and Tobin to Hurl Against Bees in Game at St. Petersburg Camp Received $8,500 Last Year Malone Among Hurlers Joe Eager for Action. Impact: DiMaggio's signing created a frenzy of sports contracts that led to the inflation of athlete salaries. Today, we have athletes who make more per game than many countries do in GDP. Thanks, Joe!. Fact: Did you know that DiMaggio once dated Marilyn Monroe? Talk about scoring points both on and off the field!.
• Headline: WALTER A. SUMMERTON. Impact: Walter A. Summerton's eventual fame led to a bizarre cult following that worshipped him as a figure of mystery, despite the fact that most people don’t even know who he was.. Fact: Did you know that there are more people named Walter than there are actual famous Walters? It's a tough crowd!.
• Headline: BUILDING DEFENSE BEGINS; Motion to Dismiss Denied as State Rests Case in Collapse. Impact: The defense's motion to dismiss was denied, leading to the longest trial in history, setting a precedent for future courtroom dramas and reality TV shows. Because who doesn’t love a good courtroom spectacle?. Fact: Did you know that courtrooms are basically the original reality TV? Just add a few cameras and a dramatic narrator!.
• Headline: AVERILL WILL SIGN WITH INDIANS TODAY; Outfielder to Accept Straight $16,000 or $15,000 With a $2,000 Bonus Clause. Impact: Averill's signing with the Indians sparked a series of events that would lead to the rise of player agents, eventually resulting in them being more powerful than the players themselves. Thanks for nothing, Averill!. Fact: Did you know that the term ‘free agent’ was once a euphemism for someone who couldn’t find a team? Now it’s a badge of honor!.
• Headline: Recent Religious Books. Impact: The release of recent religious books led to an influx of 'self-help' literature that somehow convinced everyone that they were now experts on spirituality and could quote scripture at parties. Spoiler: they can’t.. Fact: Did you know that the Bible is officially the best-selling book of all time? It’s the original bestseller list... and it’s still going strong!.