FEBRUARY 7, 1937

Full News Archive

• Headline: Hidden Statues for Edward VII in Ottawa. Impact: The delayed completion of the statues honoring King Edward VII led to a bizarre series of events where Ottawa became known as the 'City of Hidden Monuments.' Years later, conspiracy theorists claimed that the missing statues were part of a secret society dedicated to preserving the dignity of over-ambitious public art. Fact: Did you know that if they ever finish those statues, they might just end up in a boxing match with the city's other forgotten art pieces? Talk about a heavyweight showdown!.
• Headline: Congress Acts on Low Relief Funding. Impact: The 'low relief funds' debate inadvertently led to Congress developing a secret handshake that only members could use to access funds. This handshake became the basis for future political lobbying techniques, and you won't believe how it evolved into TikTok dances years later. Fact: You know it’s serious when Congress has to draft a compromise. They should really just draft a sitcom; it would probably be more entertaining than their actual meetings.
• Headline: The Masque of Kings Premiere. Impact: The production of 'The Masque of Kings' inspired a wave of theatrical performances that eventually led to the modern-day obsession with role-playing games – all thanks to some guys in masks and capes confusing everyone about what it means to be a king. Fact: Fun fact: 'The Masque of Kings' was also the unofficial title of the first royal family reunion, where everyone just wore crowns and argued over who had the best throne.
• Headline: SUPPERS AFTER THE THEATRE ARE BACK AGAIN; But the Modern Custom Calls for Dishes Quite Unlike Those of the Feasts of the Gay Nineties. Impact: The return of after-theatre suppers revolutionized post-show dining, ultimately leading to the establishment of Michelin-starred restaurants that serve dishes with names no one can pronounce. This sparked a global obsession with food aesthetics over actual taste. Fact: After-theatre suppers now include more kale and quinoa than the feasts of the Gay Nineties. Who knew that was the real tragedy of modern dining?.
• Headline: U. S. AVIATOR IS RESCUED; Gordon Kingsley Found by Members of Nicaraguan Guard. Impact: Gordon Kingsley's rescue became a national sensation, leading to an unintentional spike in aviator-themed rescue missions and a whole new reality TV genre that had people wondering if they could survive in the wild with just a paper map and a can-do attitude. Fact: Did you know that after his rescue, Kingsley reportedly found a new career as a motivational speaker? 'Get lost, but not too lost!' became his catchphrase.
• Headline: OLDS, AUTO PIONEER, RETIRES ONCE MORE; 'Schoolmaster of Motordom,' 72, Who Made His First Car in 1886, Plans Vacation. Impact: Olds' retirement marked the beginning of a trend where auto pioneers became celebrities, leading to future automobile inventors hosting reality shows about their lives and the constant struggle of deciding between a vacation or launching the next big electric vehicle. Fact: Olds, the 'Schoolmaster of Motordom,' probably never anticipated that 100 years later, his legacy would include people arguing over who makes the best self-driving car. Spoiler: It's still not Oldsmobile.
• Headline: A TOUR CONDUCTOR'S NEW YORK; The Many Visitors Now in the City Get From the 'Rubberneck Bus'Guides a Strange Idea of Our 'Incredible Metropolis'. Impact: The rise of the 'Rubberneck Bus' led to an explosion of tourism in New York, which eventually resulted in the city's infamous 'tourist traps' – where visitors still believe they’re experiencing authentic local culture while stepping over hot dog carts. Fact: Did you know that the 'Rubberneck Bus' was originally designed to make sure tourists didn’t miss any of the city's landmarks? But in reality, it was just a clever way to ensure they saw every single souvenir shop.
• Headline: Costumes That Europe's Peasants Wear; PEASANT COSTUME IN EUROPE: Book II. By Kathleen Mann. With Eight Illustrations in Color and Sixtyfour in Black and White. 109 pp. New York: The Macmillan Company. $4.. Impact: Kathleen Mann's exploration of peasant costumes inadvertently sparked a renaissance in fashion, leading to future runway shows where haute couture would feature what looked suspiciously like potato sack chic. Fact: You think today’s fashion is crazy? Just wait until the next trend involves wearing what could only be described as 'rustic farming attire'—thank you, Kathleen!.
• Headline: Westward Voyagers From Iceland; Voyagers From Iceland. Impact: The voyages from Iceland inspired an entire genre of adventure stories, which eventually led to the creation of countless fantasy novels, movies, and the odd Viking-themed dinner party that still confuses the neighbors. Fact: You know you're in for a wild ride when a bunch of Icelandic voyagers can inspire a whole literary movement. Next up: the sequel, 'Icelandic Voyagers: The Return of the Sagas.'.
• Headline: Awards to Jackson and Lazzeri to Mark Writers Dinner; BASEBALL WRITERS TO FROLIC TONIGHT. Impact: The awards to Jackson and Lazzeri during a baseball writers' dinner set a precedent for how athletes and writers interact, resulting in the bizarre tradition of athletes being asked to comment on Shakespeare at award shows. Who knew baseball could be so cultured?. Fact: Baseball writers frolicking over awards? Sounds like the beginning of a great sitcom! Somebody get the cameras rolling, because this is pure gold!.