DECEMBER 26, 1936

Full News Archive

• Headline: Jesse Owens Race at Havana Carnival. Impact: When Owens raced that horse, the horse realized it was living in a world where it was being compared to an Olympic legend. This sent it into an existential crisis, leading to a horse therapy movement in the 1940s. Who knew equine psychology would become a thing?. Fact: Did you know that Jesse Owens once outran a horse? Apparently, that horse still hasn’t lived it down..
• Headline: Westchester County Clearing House Report 1936. Impact: The clearance of Westchester led to an explosion of suburban development, which ultimately resulted in the rise of the first coffee shop chains. Without those clearings, we might still be drinking instant coffee in our parents' basements.. Fact: Westchester Clearings: the place where dreams of overpriced lattes and artisanal cupcakes were born..
• Headline: Stockholders Approve Dissolution Plan. Impact: The approval of the dissolution plan triggered a chain reaction of corporate breakups that eventually led to speed dating for businesses, resulting in the rise of the 'merger and acquisition' romance novel genre. Who doesn’t love a good corporate love story?. Fact: Stockholders approving dissolution plans: because nothing says 'I love you' like breaking up your company..
• Headline: RIFT WITH BRITISH DOUBTED IN BERLIN; Eden's Hint of London Terms for Cooperation Held to Eclipse the Spanish Issue. RUMORS IN PRESS ASSAILED German Spokesman Sees No Basis for Reports of Vital Action by Hitler Soon. RIFT WITH BRITISH DOUBTED IN BERLIN. Impact: The rift with the British was so exaggerated, it gave birth to the concept of 'fake news.' This paved the way for the internet age, where everyone is a journalist but no one knows what they’re talking about.. Fact: This rift was so dramatic it could have been a soap opera. Stay tuned for next week's episode: 'As the Reich Turns.'.
• Headline: HOLY NAME TO HOLD 54TH ANNUAL MASS; Cardinal Hayes to Preside in St. Patrick's Cathedral on New Year's Day. WELCOME FOR MISSIONARY Reception to Be Held Tuesday for Dr. Lambie -- Maude Royden to Arrive Jan. 6.. Impact: The annual mass presided over by Cardinal Hayes inadvertently inspired a new trend in fashionable church hats, which caused a minor fashion revolution among the devout. Who knew faith could be so stylish?. Fact: 54 years in, and they're still trying to figure out if the hat or the sermon is more important..
• Headline: Users of Power Strike To Force Reduced Rates. Impact: The kerosene lamp protest sparked a revolutionary movement that eventually led to the invention of mood lighting, giving rise to romantic dinners and Instagram influencers. All thanks to a bunch of disgruntled power users!. Fact: Who knew that striking for lower rates would lead to candlelit dinners and the invention of hipster cafes? Light bulbs were probably rolling their eyes..
• Headline: UTILITIES ATTACKED IN DRIVE TO RATIFY ST. LAWRENCE PACT; Walsh Protests Move of Niagara Concern to Divert More Water for Power. PUBLIC DOMAIN IS URGED Petition Charges Private Interests Are Seeking Alliance in Quebec to Retain Control. UTILITIES ATTACKED IN WATER WAY FIGHT. Impact: The utilities' attack on the St. Lawrence Pact set off a series of environmental debates that would eventually lead to the modern Green Movement. So, in a roundabout way, this power struggle saved the planet. Thanks, guys!. Fact: Utilities fighting over water rights: because nothing says 'progress' like bickering over who gets to drain a river..
• Headline: An Outstanding Performer. Impact: K Klein's outstanding feats inspired a generation of athletes to actually try hard at sports, which eventually led to the rise of overly competitive parents at youth sports games. Thanks, K Klein, for ruining childhoods!. Fact: Outstanding performances: the kind of achievements that make you realize you’ve been wasting your life on Netflix..