DECEMBER 7, 1936

Full News Archive

• Headline: Teen Bank Heist Attempt in Tokyo. Impact: This attempted bank heist inadvertently led to the creation of a new reality show: 'Bank Robbery Gone Wrong – The Teen Edition'. Ratings soared, and so did the number of poorly planned heists.. Fact: Did you know that in Japan, banks are often more secure than fortresses? They even have door guards who look like they just stepped out of a samurai movie!.
• Headline: NAZI Boycott Affirmed in Newark Meeting. Impact: The Nazi boycott set off a chain of events that eventually led to the rise of hipster cafes in Berlin, where people ironically sip coffee while reading about the atrocities of history.. Fact: Fun fact: Boycotts are like trendy diets; everyone jumps on board until they realize they just miss the good stuff too much!.
• Headline: STATUS OF LABOR IMPROVED IN CUBA; United States Ambassador Finds Workers' Position Strongest in History. HOURS AND WAGES BETTER Legislation Assures Vacations, Regulates Dismissal, Guards Women and Children.. Impact: Cuban labor improvements eventually inspired a global trend of mandatory siestas, leading to a more relaxed world where deadlines are just suggestions.. Fact: Did you know that 'Cuba' translates to 'where time doesn't exist'? Well, they certainly took that motto to heart with these labor reforms!.
• Headline: CONFERS 0N KING IN DUBLIN; De Valera Consults Aides on Note Believed Received From London.. Impact: This meeting in Dublin led to an accidental email chain that sparked the Great Irish Coffee Debate of 2025, where everyone argued whether whiskey or Bailey's was the superior additive.. Fact: Did you know that De Valera once considered running for President of the United States? Thankfully, he realized that he couldn't pronounce 'New Hampshire'!.
• Headline: CANARIES WIN AWARDS; Brooklyn Fancier Takes 7 Prizes at Show of Caged Pets.. Impact: The Canaries winning awards triggered an international movement for bird rights, leading to a short-lived but passionate 'Birds Deserve Oscars' campaign.. Fact: Did you know that caged birds are often more popular than some celebrities? At least they don’t have public meltdowns every other week!.
• Headline: AMERICAN BEATEN IN INSURGENT CAMP; Safe at Valencia, He Tells of Floggings Received by 8,000 From German Guards. HIS FRONT TEETH SMASHED Other Foreigners Held by the Rebels in Canary Isles, He Says -- U.S. Consul Aided Him.. Impact: This American's tale of woe became the inspiration for a bestselling thriller novel series, 'The Rebel Camp Diaries', which features a protagonist who always escapes just in the nick of time.. Fact: Did you know that getting your teeth smashed in a rebel camp is not a recommended travel experience? Ironically, it’s a great way to lose weight!.
• Headline: CEILING FALLS ON FAMILY; Mother and Two Children Hurt by Shower of Plaster.. Impact: When the ceiling fell, it led to a nationwide obsession with home inspections, sparking a bizarre trend of 'plaster parties' where people gather to watch ceilings being reinforced.. Fact: Did you know that in NYC, falling plaster is considered a rite of passage? Just another day in the concrete jungle!.
• Headline: Westchester Bank Clearings Off. Impact: The drop in bank clearings led to a massive increase in people hoarding cash under their mattresses, which later caused a shortage of good beds to sleep on.. Fact: Did you know that banks love to report their clearings like they're announcing a sporting event? 'And it's a slam dunk for Westchester!'.