DECEMBER 3, 1935

Full News Archive

• Headline: Growing Unemployment Relief Concerns in Albany. Impact: The puzzling rise in unemployment relief led to the creation of a secret society of mayors who held monthly meetings on how to look busy while doing absolutely nothing. This resulted in an entire generation of politicians who excelled in the art of baffling the public with their endless meetings.. Fact: Did you know that Mayor Thacher's puzzled face became a meme in the 1940s? It was the precursor to the 'Confused Nick Young' meme we know and love today!.
• Headline: Alabama's Support for Ethiopia in 1935. Impact: The aid from Alabama Negroes to Ethiopia sparked an underground movement that inspired future generations to stand up for international solidarity. Little did they know, it also led to the invention of the hashtag in the 21st century – #EthiopiaAid – because nothing says help like a social media post.. Fact: Fun fact: This act of solidarity was so inspiring that it led to the creation of a secret club of altruistic hipsters who only drank Ethiopian coffee to show their support. It’s a very exclusive club..
• Headline: Nazis Crack Down on Protestant Dissent. Impact: Kerrl's repression of Protestant foes unleashed a wave of rebellion that would eventually lead to the invention of the 'Church of the Resistance.' This church was known for its coffee shop that served only decaf and hosted weekly 'Protest' nights – where everyone just sipped tea in silence.. Fact: Interesting tidbit: The Nazis were so concerned about church unity that they accidentally united all dissenting factions into a supergroup called 'The Holy Resistance,' which was basically a rock band in disguise..
• Headline: MARY LOUISE KENT WED TO K. E. BROWN; AAA Official Becomes Bride of Labor Department Attache in Bangor, Pa.. Impact: Mary Louise Kent's marriage to K. E. Brown sparked a nationwide trend of bureaucratic romances, leading to a reality show called 'Love in the Office' where government officials navigated romance and red tape simultaneously. Spoiler alert: it never ended well.. Fact: Did you know that Mary and K.E. went on to have a wedding cake shaped like a government building? Yes, because nothing screams 'love' like a three-tiered structure of bureaucracy..
• Headline: Sarah Grace Cissel andAllen M. Whitlock, Both of Elizabeth, Are Engaged to Marry. Impact: The engagement of Sarah Grace Cissel and Allen M. Whitlock set off a chain reaction of other engagements, leading to a national average of 2.5 engagement rings per square mile. Jewelry stores thrived, and 'engagement season' became a thing, forever ruining the winter holidays.. Fact: Fun fact: Their engagement announcement inspired a wave of poetry that was so bad it made the love letters of the 1800s look like Shakespeare..
• Headline: FIRST LADY' TO AID A CHARITABLE CAUSE; Mrs. Franklin D. Roosevelt Will Be Guest of Honor Tonight ag Performance of Play.. Impact: Mrs. Roosevelt's appearance at a charitable performance caused a ripple of goodwill that led to the establishment of the 'First Ladies' Charity Challenge,' where each first lady competed to outdo the last in outrageous charity events, from skydiving to knitting marathons.. Fact: Did you know that Eleanor Roosevelt once tried to auction off her old shoes for charity? The shoes ended up fetching more than some of her husband's policies..
• Headline: ITALIANS PREPARE FOR SANCTION WAR; Ready for a Suicidal Attack on World in Preference to Slow Starvation. SEE FATE DECIDED HERE Mussolini Would Be Repudiated if He Gave In to Pressure of Embargo Now.. Impact: Italy's readiness for a 'Sanction War' inadvertently led to the creation of a popular board game called 'Sanctioned Warfare,' where players aim to outlast each other without declaring bankruptcy. This game has caused more arguments at family gatherings than Monopoly.. Fact: Fun fact: Mussolini was reportedly so against the idea of sanctions that he once shouted at a postcard of the United States, claiming it was an unfair trade partner..
• Headline: LIFT TIAJUANA GAMING BAN; Mexicans Move to Rehabilitate Bankrupt Racing Resort. Impact: The lifting of the gaming ban in Tijuana led to an explosion of gambling tourism that would eventually inspire a Las Vegas-style resort. Little did they know, this would also create the world's first mobile casino – a rickety old bus that went around collecting bets.. Fact: Did you know that the Tijuana gaming ban was originally enforced because too many people were winning? Apparently, the government didn't want to be outmatched by dice rollers..