NOVEMBER 25, 1935

Full News Archive

• Headline: Call for Moral Recovery in 1935. Impact: Little did Dr. Simons know, his call for moral recovery would inspire a future generation to create a self-help book empire, leading to the rise of motivational speakers who would eventually ruin all family gatherings.. Fact: Did you know that idealism has become synonymous with 'I really like the idea of being a decent person but I also really like my couch'?.
• Headline: Business Upturn in 1935 Economy. Impact: The celebration of business upturns led to an overzealous belief in perpetual prosperity, ultimately resulting in the creation of the phrase 'too big to fail'—a classic case of wishful thinking that would haunt the economy for decades.. Fact: Fun fact: 'Boom and bust' is just the economy's way of doing the cha-cha—two steps forward, one step back, and a lot of regret..
• Headline: Harvard's 300th Anniversary Scholarships Initiative. Impact: The push for new scholarships and professorships at Harvard would eventually lead to the creation of the 'ivory tower' stereotype, where professors become so lost in their theories that they forget how to communicate with actual humans.. Fact: Harvard's 300th anniversary? That’s like a birthday party for a really smart person who still can’t find a date..
• Headline: DUCKS TIGHTER IN OIL TRAP; Wind Sweeping Hundreds of Helpless Birds Out Into Sound.. Impact: The plight of the ducks would spark an environmental movement, leading to more regulations to protect wildlife while also giving rise to the phrase 'ducking responsibility'—a favorite among politicians.. Fact: Did you know that ducks can actually be quite dramatic? They quack, they waddle, and they definitely have a flair for the theatrical when stuck in oil..
• Headline: BANDIT, 14, IS SEIZED WITH PISTOL IN BOOK; Newark Police Say He Admits Robberies and Firing Shot at Druggist Victim.. Impact: The story of a 14-year-old bandit would lead to increased discussions about juvenile crime, eventually resulting in the 'bandit' archetype in media, where rebellious youths become the unlikely heroes in films much later.. Fact: Did you know that the only thing more dangerous than a kid with a pistol is a kid with a smartphone? At least you can see the pistol coming!.
• Headline: Religion as Kinship to God.. Impact: This sermon would contribute to the ongoing debate about religion and its role in society, setting the stage for centuries of philosophical discussions that would leave many scratching their heads or just hitting the snooze button.. Fact: Kinship to God? That's just a fancy way of saying 'I promise to act good, but only when I'm not trying to enjoy my weekend.'.
• Headline: An Unusual Visitor.. Impact: The owl sighting in downtown New York would ignite a frenzy of urban wildlife spotting, leading to a future where every pigeon and raccoon became an Instagram influencer.. Fact: Owls are known for their wisdom, which is why you’ll never see one trying to explain Twitter to a pigeon..
• Headline: Handicraft Sale Tea Today.. Impact: The handicraft sale may seem mundane, but it would lead to the hipster movement, where artisanal everything becomes the norm, and people start paying $10 for a cupcake decorated with a single sprinkle.. Fact: Handicrafts? That's just the polite way of saying 'I have too much free time and not enough hobbies.'.
• Headline: Regulations and Rights.. Impact: This discussion on regulations and rights would kick off a never-ending debate that would spiral into a labyrinth of bureaucracy, ultimately resulting in paperwork that could rival the length of a Tolstoy novel.. Fact: Regulations are like that friend who always has to read the terms and conditions—nobody really enjoys it, but we all know someone has to do it..