NOVEMBER 22, 1934

Full News Archive

• Headline: Court Angered by Early Parole Decision. Impact: This parole decision sparked a series of debates on prison reform that eventually led to the establishment of a reality TV show called 'Parole or No Parole,' where inmates compete for freedom by reciting Shakespeare. Spoiler alert: it never made it to air.. Fact: The only thing more shocking than a parole board's decision is the fact that they still use 'Sing Sing' as the name of a prison. Sounds like a theme park for criminals..
• Headline: The Bold Works of a Rebel Etcher. Impact: The etcher's rebellion inspired a new genre of rebellious art, leading to the rise of edgy Instagram artists who claim their coffee cup art is a 'profound statement on the human condition.'. Fact: Etching is like the punk rock of painting—if you don't use enough angst, did you even etch?.
• Headline: LIPPMANN RETURNS, GLOOMY OVER EUROPE; But Finds the United States a 'Healthy Man Recovering From Nervous Breakdown.'. Impact: Lippmann's gloomy report on Europe inspired a generation of pessimistic poets who turned their angst into bestselling novels, proving that misery does indeed love company.. Fact: The phrase 'healthy man recovering from a nervous breakdown' is basically the 1930s version of a motivational poster gone wrong..
• Headline: Jews Honor King Alexander.. Impact: Honoring King Alexander sparked a renewed interest in historical figures, leading to a bizarre trend of naming pets after obscure kings and queens, resulting in the most regal dog park in history.. Fact: You know you've hit peak historical nerd when your dog is named after a king and you throw it a birthday party in a castle..
• Headline: F.E. Myers Preferred Called.. Impact: F.E. Myers' preferred calling led to a sudden rise in businesses using only initials to create a sense of mystery, resulting in a slew of confusing Yelp reviews about ‘F.E. & Bros’ that still haunt the internet.. Fact: The only thing more confusing than a company name with initials is trying to explain to your grandma what they actually do..