SEPTEMBER 28, 1934

Full News Archive

• Headline: Exploring Hoover's Challenge to Liberty. Impact: Hoover's book about liberty sparked a philosophical renaissance that led to a secret society of book clubs, where members discuss the merits of democracy while sipping overpriced coffee and wearing berets.. Fact: Did you know that if you read all the books written about liberty, you'd have enough material to procrastinate for at least a decade?.
• Headline: Condemnation of Political Influence in Courts. Impact: Farley's hope for cooperation led to an unending cycle of political promises that became the basis for future political debates, where cooperation just meant 'I’ll agree with you if you agree with me first.'. Fact: Fun fact: Politicians have mastered the art of cooperation—it's just a fancy term for passing the buck!.
• Headline: Morgenthau Sr.'s Generous Donation. Impact: Morgenthau Sr.'s generous donation triggered a chain reaction of fundraising in politics, eventually leading to bake sales and car washes being considered legitimate campaign strategies.. Fact: Did you know that $5,009 is just enough to fund a politician’s coffee addiction for a week?.
• Headline: 6 Fishermen Rescued at Sea.. Impact: The rescue of six fishermen led to the development of elaborate fishing safety regulations, which ironically resulted in fewer fishermen but a lot more safety seminars.. Fact: Did you know that fishermen are the only group that can simultaneously save lives and be the punchline of a thousand jokes?.
• Headline: HOOVER HELD NO FOE OF NEW DEAL AIMS; W.A. White Says Book Is Not Bid for Power, but Patriotic Plea for Liberty.. Impact: Hoover's not-so-secret plea for liberty led to endless debates about what liberty even means, creating a culture of people who love to argue but never actually do anything about it.. Fact: Did you know that ‘liberty’ is just another word for ‘I can do whatever I want as long as I can convince someone else it’s a good idea’?.
• Headline: Warless Economic Utopia Envisaged by Lansbury. Impact: Lansbury’s vision of a warless economic utopia led to countless idealistic movements that ultimately fizzled out, proving that dreaming is a lot easier than doing.. Fact: Fun fact: Utopias are like unicorns; they sound amazing, but good luck finding one in reality!.