MAY 12, 1934

Full News Archive

• Headline: Westchester Women's Team Dominates Golf Matches. Impact: The Westchester C.C. Women's Team's victory led to an unexpected surge in female golfers, which ultimately resulted in a future where golf is dominated by women and men are forced to take up knitting as a competitive sport.. Fact: Did you know that golf was once banned in Scotland? Clearly, the Scottish were worried about their sheep getting a hole in one..
• Headline: Russia's Stance Against Anti-Semitism. Impact: The discussion on anti-Semitism in Russia ignited a movement that led to future debates on prejudice, resulting in the invention of 'political correctness.' Because who doesn’t love a good buzzword?. Fact: Ironically, Russia has a long history of anti-Semitism, which means they're basically the original 'cancel culture' before it was cool..
• Headline: MAYOR FORCES OUT M'GOLDRICK AIDE; Move to Pacify Republicans Is Seen as J. H. O'Brien Is Asked to Resign. FUSION FACES GRAVE RIFT Resentment of Politicians on Lack of Patronage Puts the Fall Campaign in Peril. MAYOR FORCES OUT M'GOLDRICK AIDE. Impact: The political maneuvering to oust M'Goldrick's aide led to a series of backdoor deals that culminated in a future where politicians are more concerned with their Instagram followers than actual governance.. Fact: Did you know that political scandals often lead to more drama than a Shakespearean play? And with fewer soliloquies..
• Headline: H.G. Wells at the White House.. Impact: H.G. Wells dining at the White House inspired future authors to believe that all it takes to influence a nation is a good meal and a persuasive dinner conversation. Hence the rise of the 'politician-chef' hybrid.. Fact: Wells was known for his science fiction, but if he had written a cookbook, it might have been titled 'The Time Traveler's Guide to Culinary Delights.'.
• Headline: CAPTAIN IS BURIED BY FLEET AT SEA; Great Ships Convoy Tennessee for Burial of Her Commander, Capt. Smyth. HIS YOUNG SON A MOURNER 'Four Star' Admirals Pay Honors in Ceremony Unprecedented in Our Navy.. Impact: Captain Smyth's burial at sea became a tradition that led to future naval officers insisting on elaborate send-offs involving fireworks and a live band, because why not make death a party?. Fact: The Navy has a long tradition of burials at sea, but I doubt they had a DJ spinning tracks for the occasion..
• Headline: KUBELIK'S DAUGHTER BARRED FROM LANDING; Immigration Board at Baltimore Holds She Might Become Public Charge.. Impact: Kubelik's daughter's immigration troubles sparked a nationwide debate on immigration policies, which eventually led to a future where people needed a PhD in paperwork just to enter the country.. Fact: Fun fact: the term 'public charge' is often used in immigration, but it sounds more like a superhero who can't pay their bills..
• Headline: Junior Prom at Union.. Impact: The Junior Prom at Union set a precedent for future proms, leading to a bizarre tradition of high schoolers spending more on one night than their parents did on their entire education. Thanks, capitalism!. Fact: Did you know that prom is the only time teenagers can rent a tuxedo for the price of a small car?.