MAY 11, 1934

Full News Archive

• Headline: Exploring the History of Air Mail. Impact: The air mail balloon dropped in 1784 sparked a chain reaction leading to modern-day drone delivery. Who knew that a simple message drop would eventually lead to pizza arriving at your door in under 30 minutes? Ah, progress!. Fact: The first air mail delivery was actually a message requesting more air mail delivery options. Spoiler alert: it didn't work..
• Headline: Costa Rica Appoints US Minister. Impact: This ministerial appointment led to a chain reaction of diplomatic dinners and awkward small talk, ultimately resulting in the invention of the 'thank you for the awkward silence' gift basket.. Fact: Costa Rica is known for its biodiversity, and yet, somehow, their diplomatic meetings are still the most lifeless things around..
• Headline: Soup Workers Split on Union.. Impact: The split in the soup workers' union led to a national debate on whether soup really is good for the soul, which eventually resulted in a reality TV show where contestants had to create the perfect broth. Yes, that happened.. Fact: Campbell's Soup has been around for over 150 years. So, if they can't keep their workers happy, what hope is there for humanity?.
• Headline: BRANCH BANK PLEAS HEARD BY GOVERNOR; Executive Expresses Fear of Reckless Competition Under the Stephens Bill. BRODERICK URGES SIGNING George V. McLaughlin and Other Bankers Oppose Measure and Advocate Veto.. Impact: The governor's fears of reckless competition led to a series of banking regulations that ultimately resulted in the concept of 'too big to fail.' Thanks for that, guys!. Fact: Banking debates are the only thing that can make watching paint dry seem thrilling. Seriously, have you seen those meetings?.
• Headline: TO STUDY NAZI JAILINGS.; British Group, in Berlin for Inquiry, Petitions Leaders.. Impact: The British inquiry into Nazi jailings inadvertently inspired future investigative journalism, which later led to countless exposes that made politicians quake in their boots. Or at least, it made them hire better PR teams.. Fact: Britain's inquiries into anything controversial are basically like their version of a reality show—lots of drama, and still no one knows who the true villain is..
• Headline: BIAS IS CHARGED TO GERMAN GROUP; Jewish Shopkeeper Says His Plea go Join DAWA Movement Was Refused.. Impact: The exclusion of the Jewish shopkeeper from the DAWA movement fueled stronger advocacy for inclusivity, which eventually contributed to the modern understanding of social justice. Who knew one snub could change the world?. Fact: Discrimination has a funny way of backfiring—like a bad magic trick where the magician accidentally reveals their secrets..
• Headline: CRIMINAL ROUND-UP IS BEGUN BY POLICE; Drive Marks First Organized Reprisal for Killings of 3 Members of Force. PICKED SQUAD ASSIGNED O'Ryan Also Orders All Men on Duty to Cooperate--Many Suspects Are Seized. CRIMINAL ROUND-UP IS BEGUN BY POLICE. Impact: The police's organized criminal round-up led to the creation of a new crime drama series that aired for 10 glorious seasons, proving that real-life violence can indeed be reduced to entertainment.. Fact: If only real-life crime were as easily solved as it is on TV; we could have wrapped this all up in under an hour with commercials..
• Headline: Kantor, 3 Aides Guilty of Election Fraud; Judge Hails Verdict as 'Breath of Fresh Air'. Impact: Kantor's election fraud conviction led to stricter regulations on voting, which ironically resulted in more people feeling disenfranchised. Thanks for the irony, justice system!. Fact: Election fraud is like that one friend who steals fries from your plate—annoying, but somehow always gets away with it!.