OCTOBER 15, 1933

Full News Archive

• Headline: Trade Concerns Over Drug Act Changes. Impact: The Tugwell Measures sent shockwaves through the pharmaceutical industry, leading to an underground network of 'black market' coffee substitutes that were eventually blamed for the rise of hipster culture. Who knew drug laws would lead to artisanal lattes?. Fact: Did you know that 'Tugwell' sounds like a name for an evil genius in a comic book? Just imagine him plotting to ruin the drug trade from his lair..
• Headline: Tax Refunds for Banks Announced. Impact: The banks receiving tax refunds became the first to introduce 'customer appreciation days'—which were basically just excuses to hand out free pens and coffee. This eventually evolved into the bizarre obsession with loyalty programs.. Fact: Isn't it adorable how banks can have their taxes declared unconstitutional but still manage to have a 'Customer Service' department? It’s like a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat—except the rabbit is actually just your money..
• Headline: Nitroglycerine Causes Plane Explosion. Impact: The nitroglycerine explosion incident led to a heightened fear of flying, resulting in the creation of 'In-Flight Safety' videos. Ironically, these videos are now the most dangerous part of the flight experience.. Fact: Did you know that nitroglycerine is also used in heart medication? Nothing like a little explosive medicine to spice up your cardiac care!.
• Headline: Auto Ride to Jail Denied.. Impact: The denial of an auto ride to jail became the cornerstone of a new trend: 'Uber for Criminals.' Because, of course, if you're going to jail, you might as well be stylish about it.. Fact: Did you know that being denied a ride to jail is probably the only time someone has been disappointed about not getting into a car? What a plot twist!.
• Headline: New Mystery Stories; MENACE. By Philip MacDonald. 304 pp. New York: Doubleday, Doran & Co. $2.. Impact: The release of 'Menace' sparked a literary wave that would eventually lead to the creation of the mystery genre as we know it. Who knew a book could lead to countless hours of people shouting 'It was the butler!'?. Fact: Philip MacDonald, the author, probably had a family member who told him he should stick to writing about the weather. And the rest is history!.
• Headline: FIGHT ON CITY BILLS LIKELY AT SESSION; Fearon, in Statement, Links Fate With Success or Failure of Monroe Measure.. Impact: Fearon's comments kicked off a never-ending cycle of political posturing. This eventually led to the classic meme format: 'This is why we can't have nice things,' which still holds true today.. Fact: Politicians linking their fates to bills is like a game of Jenga—one wrong move and everything comes crashing down, but they still insist they know what they're doing..
• Headline: PUERTO RICANS TO PARADE; Demonstration for New Deal Will Be Held in San Juan Today.. Impact: The Puerto Rican parade for the New Deal turned into an annual event that would inspire countless parades worldwide, proving that nothing unites people like free tacos and a good cause.. Fact: Parades are the only event where you can throw confetti and pretend you’re being productive. In reality, you’re just really good at making a mess in public..
• Headline: HORSE SHOW PRIZE WON BY LADY ERIN; Pond's Mare Takes Jumpers' Title in Clove Lake Fall Event on Staten Island.. Impact: Lady Erin's win at the horse show led to an explosion of equestrian-themed events, where 'pride' and 'horses' became a package deal. It also birthed the phrase 'let’s saddle up' as a euphemism for getting serious.. Fact: Did you know that horses are the only animals that can make you feel guilty about not exercising? Just look at them and try to justify your couch potato lifestyle!.