SEPTEMBER 26, 1933

Full News Archive

• Headline: Bailey's Escape Assistant Pleads Guilty. Impact: If only G C Bevill had just decided to binge-watch a crime drama instead of aiding an escape! Who knew that a guilty plea could lead to an explosion of escape-artist wannabes across the nation? Now we have escape rooms everywhere. Thanks a lot, Bevill.. Fact: Did you know that 'aiding an escape' is often just a euphemism for 'really bad life choices'?.
• Headline: Aid Sent to Tampico via Plane Radios. Impact: This frantic radio plea from Pan American Airways sparked a chain reaction that led to the invention of the modern air drop. Next thing you know, the military is dropping everything from food to questionable new age pamphlets from planes!. Fact: Did you know that if you drop food from a plane, it’s technically a 'high-flying buffet'? Bon appétit!.
• Headline: Flint Bank Heist Shocks Community. Impact: The Flint bank robbery led to stricter bank security measures and the rise of the phrase 'Don't bring a machine gun to a cash withdrawal.' Who knew a $4,500 heist could shape the future of banking etiquette?. Fact: Did you know that in Michigan, robbing a bank with a machine gun is considered 'overkill'? Literally..
• Headline: LUER DEFENDANTS CLASH.; Gitcho Accuses Norvell In Illinois Kidnapping Trial.. Impact: This accusation in an Illinois kidnapping trial led to a legal precedent that made future kidnappers think twice. Spoiler alert: it also inspired a series of terrible crime dramas where everyone just accuses everyone.. Fact: Did you know that accusations in court can sometimes be more entertaining than the actual crime? It's the original reality TV..
• Headline: GEORGE L. BACHAM.. Impact: George L. Bacham's long life and contributions to education may have inspired future generations to actually care about their studies. Or at least, to pretend to care while scrolling through their phones.. Fact: Did you know 92 is just a number? But hey, he probably had more wisdom than all the TikTok influencers combined!.
• Headline: RACKET PROSECUTOR ACCUSED OF BARGAIN; But Geoghan Denies He Agreed to Defer Trial for Guilty Plea on One Charge.. Impact: Geoghan's trial mishaps inspired a new genre of courtroom dramas where prosecutors are just as shady as the defendants. Because why not add some spice to the legal system?. Fact: Did you know that courtroom deals often sound more like bad sitcom plots? Like, 'Will They or Won’t They... Go to Jail?'.
• Headline: SHARP QUAKE IN ITALY.; Many Residents of Rome and Naples Are Frightened.. Impact: The sharp quake in Italy gave rise to a new trend in earthquake preparedness, turning people into 'quake preppers.' Because when the ground shakes, nothing says safety like a pantry full of canned beans.. Fact: Did you know that the best way to prepare for an earthquake is to just stand still and hope for the best? Or, you know, have a solid plan..
• Headline: Pope Names New Chancellor.. Impact: The Pope naming a new Chancellor sparked a series of appointments that made church politics almost as entertaining as an episode of 'The Office.' Who knew Vatican politics could be so cutthroat?. Fact: Did you know that in the Vatican, a 'chancellor' is just as likely to be a title for a job as it is for a really intense game of chess?.
• Headline: BOOKS OF THE TIMES. Impact: William Graham Sumner’s reminiscences became a treasure trove for future historians, proving that sometimes, the past is just as chaotic as today. Future students would read his works and think, 'Wow, history really does repeat itself.'. Fact: Did you know that 'reminiscences' is just a fancy word for 'I remembered this one time...'?.