JUNE 24, 1933

Full News Archive

• Headline: Andover Drops Latin as Required Study. Impact: By dropping Latin, Andover inadvertently sparked a global trend of teenagers thinking they could get away with using emojis instead of actual vocabulary. This led to the eventual creation of a universal emoji language, which, to this day, is still debated in linguistic circles.. Fact: In ancient Rome, Latin was the language of the elite. Now, it’s the language of confused high school students who are more fluent in TikTok trends..
• Headline: Oil Men Near Code Agreement in Chicago. Impact: The agreement among oil men in Chicago eventually led to the rise of reality TV shows about oil tycoons, which have since shaped public perception of wealth, greed, and the importance of having a really big hat.. Fact: Oil tycoons are basically just really ambitious kids who never grew out of playing with toy trucks..
• Headline: Gold Shipment to England in 1933. Impact: Shipping gold to England marked the beginning of the age of international gold heists, inspiring countless movies where suave thieves steal from the rich and give to... the rich, but with a really cool soundtrack.. Fact: Gold was once considered so valuable that people would rather risk their lives than give it away. Now, we just obsess over shiny phone cases..
• Headline: THE JERSEY LEGISLATURE.. Impact: The Jersey Legislature’s mundane activities eventually paved the way for local governments everywhere to realize they could hold sessions just to talk about absolutely nothing for hours, leading to the invention of the filibuster.. Fact: Legislative sessions are like family dinners—lots of talking and very little actual food for thought..
• Headline: FRIENDLY SOCIETY ELECTS; Miss H.C. Brent of Geneva, N.Y., Is Named Head of Girls' Work.. Impact: Miss H.C. Brent’s election led to a chain reaction of women stepping into leadership roles, ultimately resulting in the creation of the phrase 'You go, girl!' being used at every possible occasion, including brunch.. Fact: The term 'Friendly Society' sounds nice, but it’s basically just a group of people who agree to share their snacks..
• Headline: Lowers Preferred Dividend.. Impact: By lowering preferred dividends, companies discovered a new way to annoy investors, leading to a worldwide trend of passive-aggressive emails that still plague inboxes today.. Fact: Lowering dividends is like telling someone you love them, but only on days that end with 'y.'.
• Headline: 10,000,000TH TICKET LUCKY; Bremen Passenger Receives Free Round Trip From Ship Concern.. Impact: The Bremen passenger's lucky round trip ticket became the foundation for a new lottery industry, where every day millions dream of winning big, while their odds of being struck by lightning remain far better.. Fact: Winning a free round trip is like finding a $20 bill in your pocket—great for a moment, but ultimately just a reminder of what you’ll never actually have..
• Headline: BRITISH TO STAGE RECORD AIR SHOWS; 200 Planes Are to Perform Today at Hendon in Annual Royal Air Force Display. TRADE FLYING ON MONDAY British Aircraft Constructors to Exhibit Wares to Visitors From 55 Countries.. Impact: The British air shows ignited a passion for aviation that eventually spiraled into the era of air travel, where people pay extra for legroom and fight over overhead bin space like it's the last slice of pizza.. Fact: Air shows are just an elaborate way for pilots to show off while the rest of us sit in traffic wishing we could fly..
• Headline: Rogers Notes Two Items Of Interest in the News. Impact: A.E. Smith’s decoration became a catalyst for future generations of scholars to obsess over irrelevant awards, leading to the widespread phenomenon of participation trophies.. Fact: Getting decorated by Harvard sounds impressive, but it’s basically just a fancy way of saying you were really good at sitting in classrooms..