OCTOBER 14, 1932

Full News Archive

• Headline: Pounds Launches Civic Reform Campaign. Impact: If E.A. MacDougall hadn't been named campaign manager, the 'Civic Reform' drive might have fizzled out faster than a soda left open for a week. Perhaps we'd all still be apathetic, watching paint dry instead of voting.. Fact: Civic reform drives are basically like trying to get people to care about a two-hour lecture on the history of paint colors..
• Headline: Philadelphia Brokers Insolvent.. Impact: The insolvency of Philadelphia brokers could be seen as the butterfly that flapped its wings, eventually leading to more regulations, or perhaps the genesis of 'get rich quick' schemes that plague the internet today.. Fact: Insolvency: the polite way of saying 'we're out of cash and also out of ideas.'.
• Headline: New Canadian Tariff Rates Compared to Old. Impact: The new Canadian tariff rates comparison could have inadvertently inspired the world's longest game of Monopoly, where everyone just keeps passing GO and collecting absolutely nothing.. Fact: Tariffs are like taxes that make sure international trade feels as complicated as possible, just to keep everyone on their toes!.
• Headline: ATTACKS COOLIDGE AS 'FALSE PROPHET'; Robinson Cites Optimistic Predictions When 'Prosperity Was Ready to Burst.' GIBES AT HIS SPEECH HERE Senator Asserts That Views Are Outworn -- Challenges Relief Credit Given to Hoover.. Impact: Robinson's attack on Coolidge could have sparked a trend of politicians outdoing each other with increasingly outrageous claims, leading to today’s reality TV-style political debates.. Fact: Calling someone a 'false prophet' is just the historical equivalent of a Twitter feud, but with more eloquent insults..
• Headline: SHULER KEY FIGURE IN CALIFORNIA VOTE; Radio Preacher Candidate for Senate on Prohibition Ticket Threatens Major Parties. LOS ANGELES HIS FIELD Great Increase in Registration There May Be Due to This Prophet's Following. A 'CHAMPION AGINER' IS HE Meanwhile, He Fights to Regain Radio License Which His Personal Attacks Cost Him.. Impact: Shuler's radio campaign might have ignited a nationwide obsession with radio preachers, eventually leading to the explosion of podcasts we see today. Thanks, Shuler, for every true-crime podcast out there.. Fact: Radio preachers: the original influencers before influencers were a thing, and they didn’t even need a selfie stick!.
• Headline: THE OTTAWA TREATIES.. Impact: The Ottawa Treaties being viewed negatively could have influenced future international agreements, making diplomats think twice before signing anything without a solid PR plan.. Fact: Treaties are basically like marriage proposals for countries—hope everyone plays nice, but often someone ends up fighting over the remote control..
• Headline: ASKS EASING OF BAN ON PARKING GARAGES; Sullivan Will Urge Amendment to Zoning Law Before the Estimate Board Today. WOULD FACILITATE BUILDING Change Would Require Only 50 Per Cent of Owners in Affected Area to Consent. END OF CONGESTION SOUGHT Trade Groups Support Step to Lessen Jam of Autos in Narrow Business Streets.. Impact: Sullivan's push for easing parking garage bans could have led to a world where every street corner is a parking lot, making traffic jams feel like a daily social gathering.. Fact: Parking garages: the modern-day equivalent of ancient ruins, just with more cars and fewer tourists... for now..