JUNE 15, 1932

Full News Archive

• Headline: Private Funeral for I.C. Redfield. Impact: The passing of 1. C. Redfield led to a series of increasingly boring bureaucratic meetings where his policies were re-evaluated, ultimately resulting in a nationwide obsession with filing cabinets and paperwork. Who knew one man’s death could lead to the rise of the modern office? Thank you, 1. C.!. Fact: Did you know that 1. C. Redfield was once considered for a role in a silent film but was rejected for being too good at paperwork? True story..
• Headline: Bach Choir Performs at Notable Funeral. Impact: The choir's performance was so moving that it inspired a new trend of singing at all major events, including weddings, bar mitzvahs, and grocery store openings. Cue the awkward harmonies!. Fact: Fun fact: The Bach Choir was so good, even the mourners contemplated faking their own deaths just to hear more..
• Headline: Publishers Combat Cheap Book Editions. Impact: The publishers' battle against cut-rate reprints set off a chain reaction that led to the rise of underground book clubs and the secretive exchange of dog-eared paperbacks. Libraries everywhere became the new hip hangout spots.. Fact: Fun fact: The phrase 'cut-rate' was originally used to describe unsuccessful haircut salons. Who knew books could be just as scandalous?.
• Headline: POLICE BAR RED MARCH ON CONVENTION HALL; Rout 300 Communists in Brief Skirmish Half Block From Stadium in Chicago.. Impact: The police's swift action against the marchers inadvertently sparked a covert appreciation for marching bands among the public, leading to a resurgence of parades. Who knew communism and confetti could mix?. Fact: Did you know that the police were secretly practicing their dance moves for the next big parade? Just kidding, they were just trying to keep up with the rhythm of the times..
• Headline: Two German Liners in Collision.. Impact: The collision of the two liners led to a new maritime safety protocol that involved mandatory dance lessons for captains. Turns out, waltzing at the helm is not a great idea.. Fact: Fun fact: The captains of both ships decided to blame it on 'bad weather,' even though it was a perfectly sunny day—classic maritime excuse!.
• Headline: SAVING WESTCHESTER.; County Is Seen Drifting the Control of Tammany.. Impact: The impending control shift led to a decades-long game of political musical chairs in Westchester, where everyone was too busy playing to realize the music had stopped.. Fact: Did you know that Tammany Hall once considered adding a funhouse mirror section to their headquarters? Just to confuse their opponents, of course!.
• Headline: PAPEN GOES TO LAUSANNE.; Heads Large Delegation on His First Trip Abroad as Chancellor.. Impact: Papen's trip to Lausanne helped establish international travel as a necessary evil for politicians, leading to more frequent global summits and an increase in frequent flyer miles for the already jet-setting elite.. Fact: Did you know that Papen packed three times more socks than necessary for this trip? Clearly, he was ready for any diplomatic situation—just not the laundry!.