AUGUST 7, 1931

Full News Archive

• Headline: French Casinos Seek Tax Relief Amid Crisis. Impact: Had the Premier granted tax relief, French casinos might have become the Vegas of Europe, leading to a new wave of 'Casino Royale' knock-offs and a global obsession with gambling-themed reality shows. Welcome to the age of the reality TV star as a financial advisor.. Fact: In a twist of fate, the first casino to open in France was actually a health spa in 1763. So, think of this bankruptcy as history's way of saying 'what goes around, comes around'—but with more roulette wheels..
• Headline: Coal Operators Seek Federal Oversight. Impact: If federal control had actually happened, we could've seen the birth of a new government agency: the Bureau of Coal, whose sole purpose would be to argue about the right way to shovel coal. Imagine the bureaucratic meetings over the best shoveling techniques!. Fact: The term 'soft coal' is actually a euphemism. It doesn’t mean it’s soft like a pillow; it means it’s easier to ignite. So, no, you can’t use it for your next cozy bonfire..
• Headline: Hotel Business Surpasses One Billion Dollars. Impact: The booming hotel business in 1929 was the precursor to the Great Depression, which led to the eventual rise of the 'staycation.' So, if you ever wondered why your parents insist on vacationing at home, blame the Ritz-Carlton's financial woes.. Fact: In 1929, the hotel industry was so booming that it almost made people forget the stock market was about to crash. Talk about party on the Titanic!.
• Headline: MRS. VON ARNOLD DROWNS; Wife of Straus Tutor Is Victim of Boating Accident.. Impact: The tragic drowning of Mrs. Von Arnold could have led to stricter boating regulations, preventing future mishaps. Or, it might have simply inspired a new genre of sad boating songs. Either way, the ripples would have been felt for generations.. Fact: Boating accidents have a long history of dramatic outcomes. Just ask any sailor; they have more tales than your average fisherman!.
• Headline: NO NEW CUT IN MARINES.; Reduction off 1,185, Going on, An- nounced in June, Says Fuller.. Impact: If the Marines had reduced their numbers further, we might have ended up with a whole new definition of 'Marine reserve'—like a summer camp where they learn the art of not getting shot at.. Fact: The Marines have been around since 1775, proving that if you want to fight for your country, you better be ready to show up, even if it means cutting back on your numbers occasionally..
• Headline: IMPOSSIBLE BUT TRUE.. Impact: The headline's absurdity suggests that if U.S. foreign trade could be deemed 'impossible but true,' perhaps aliens might have started trading with us, leading to a galaxy-wide commerce boom. Who wouldn't want to buy moon rocks?. Fact: The phrase 'impossible but true' is often used to describe that one friend who insists they once wrestled a bear. Spoiler alert: they probably didn’t..
• Headline: ATLANTIC CITY HOTEL IN HANDS OF TRUSTEE; The Ritz-Carlton Taken Over by Bondholders' Representative as Result of Business Depression.. Impact: The Ritz-Carlton's financial collapse could have sparked a trend of luxury hotels becoming budget-friendly chains. Imagine if we’d all been able to vacation in style—just as long as we didn't mind sharing a room with three strangers.. Fact: The Ritz-Carlton was once considered the epitome of luxury. Now, it’s just a reminder that even the rich can go broke—like a cautionary tale in a fairy tale..
• Headline: WRITS BARRING RAIDS ON POLITICAL CLUBS GIVEN UP BY HILLY; Seabury Hunts Gang Lairs in Organizations Guarded by Court Injunctions. HE REJECTS SECRECY PLEA City Attorney Vainly Asks for Data to Be Held 'Privileged'-- Mulrooney Aides Are Called. MAYOR'S FUNDS ARE SIFTED But Counsel Refuses to Confirm Report Walker's Bank Accounts Have Been Subpoenaed. Political Pressure Hunted. Silent on Walker Accounts. RECORDS ON POLICE GIVEN OF BY HILLY Harvey Charges Pressed. City Court Justice Queried. Stenographers' Bills Explained. SEABURY LISTS INJUNCTIONS. Gives Records of Cases Against the Police Turned Over by Hilly.. Impact: The political turmoil hinted at in this headline could have led to the rise of a new breed of political detective shows, where every week a new city attorney solves crimes of corruption with a sidekick who is mysteriously always out of frame.. Fact: Political scandals are so common that they could fill an entire season of a soap opera. Just wait until they start casting actors to play the roles!.
• Headline: CRAMER TAKES OFF FROM ANGMAGSALIK; NEXT STOP ICELAND; ON SURPRISE SEA FLIGHT.. Impact: If Cramer’s surprise sea flight had failed, it might have deterred future pioneers of aviation, leading to a world where flying is still just a dream—like winning the lottery or eating just one potato chip.. Fact: The first successful flight was by the Wright brothers in 1903, but let’s be real: nothing says 'adventure' quite like a surprise flight to Iceland. Just keep the snacks handy!.