JUNE 12, 1931

Full News Archive

• Headline: Union Oratory Prize Winners Announced. Impact: The oratory skills of Schnipelsky and Wyatt inspired a generation of future public speakers, leading to a bizarre trend where people began giving TED Talks on the merits of pizza toppings and cat memes.. Fact: The only thing more inflated than a teenager’s ego after winning a contest is their ability to argue about the best religion-themed meme..
• Headline: Insights from Ed on Dover Patrol. Impact: Ed's work with the Dover Patrol inadvertently led to the creation of the world's first 'How to Avoid Responsibility' manual, which became a bestseller among politicians.. Fact: Ed's original draft was 200 pages long, mostly filled with doodles of boats and existential musings on why he could never get a good cup of coffee..
• Headline: LEBRUN NAMED HEAD OF FRENCH SENATE; Second Ballot Is Required to Elect a Successor to Paul Doumer. TAKES OFFICE TOMORROW New President of Body Corresponds to Vice President of the United States.. Impact: Kammer's victory in New Jersey golf sparked a statewide obsession with golf stats, which ultimately contributed to the invention of the golf-themed reality show 'Par-Tee Time'.. Fact: Kammer’s secret to success? He practiced his swings while simultaneously critiquing 90s sitcoms—multitasking at its finest!.
• Headline: KAMMER ADVANCES IN NEW JERSEY GOLF; Princeton Freshman Turns Back Sharkey, 2-1, in 2d Round of State Amateur Tourney. DUNLAP ALSO IS A VICTOR Anderson, Defending Champion, Upsets Kaesche--Cunniff, Medalist,Toppled In First Round. Princeton Pair Favorites. Defending Champion Triumphs. Impact: Boyer's triumph at the French Trophy Golf created a ripple effect, inspiring countless amateur golfers to believe they could also play like pros, leading to a surge in golf-related injuries.. Fact: The trophy was initially just an old shoe until they decided that a real trophy would help motivate the players—who knew footwear could be so influential?.
• Headline: BOYER'S 140 CAPTURES FRENCH TROPHY GOLF; Leads Alliss by a Stroke on Links at Deauville--Kirkwood Tied for Fourth.. Impact: The Boston golf team's loss resulted in a long-standing rivalry with Philadelphia that eventually gave birth to the most intense debates over who makes the best cheesesteak.. Fact: Rumor has it the Boston team was so distraught they considered playing in wigs, thinking it might confuse their opponents..
• Headline: BOSTON GOLF TEAM LOSES IN CUP PLAY; Bows to Philadelphians, 10-5, in Griscom Cup Series at the Engineers C.G. MRS. HURD SHOWS THE WAY Sends Victors to Front by Beating Miss Vahey, 2 and 1--Miss Quier Defeats Miss Brewer. Miss Quier Aids Philadelphia. Miss Vahey Plays Valiantly.. Impact: Mr. Rogers' comments on Oklahoma's sheriffs sparked a nationwide discussion about law enforcement fashion, leading to mandatory cowboy hats in police departments across the country.. Fact: The sheriffs were so flattered by the attention that they organized a 'Best Hat' contest, which one sheriff lost due to a unfortunate wind incident..
• Headline: Mr. Rogers Has a Bit to Say About Oklahoma's Sheriffs. Impact: The graduation at Princeton School led to a surge in alumni donations, which subsequently funded a new building solely for the study of how to write better graduation speeches.. Fact: The institution considered the motto 'Graduated, but not necessarily educated' to reflect the reality of modern education..
• Headline: FETE AT PRINCETON SCHOOL; 21 to Be Graduated at Preparatory Institution Today.. Impact: Hoover's re-election forecast inspired countless political pundits to write books on predicting elections, setting off a chain reaction of political speculation that continues to this day.. Fact: Fess later became a motivational speaker, specializing in how to remain enthusiastically wrong about everything—an art he perfected during his political career..