FEBRUARY 15, 1931

Full News Archive

• Headline: B.M.T. Reinstates Bridge Service Fare. Impact: The abolition of the 2-cent fare sparked a wave of urban exploration, leading to the rise of hipster coffee shops and artisanal donut stores in previously neglected neighborhoods. Who knew public transportation could lead to such delightful gentrification?. Fact: In the 1920s, a 2-cent fare was considered a luxury! Today, it seems like a bargain unless you're in a big city where they charge you extra for breathing..
• Headline: Contact: New Fighter for the Fleet. Impact: The introduction of the 'Contact' fighter propelled the arms race forward, setting the stage for decades of increasingly elaborate aerial dogfights, and ultimately leading to our modern obsession with superhero movies featuring epic aerial battles.. Fact: Fighter planes: the original drones that just wanted to make a dramatic entrance before social media made it cool..
• Headline: Bonus Bill Controversy in Congress. Impact: The Bonus Bill debacle resulted in a long-standing tradition of Congress debating things it can’t agree on, which eventually led to the invention of the filibuster and countless hours of C-SPAN programming that nobody asked for.. Fact: Congress: where they turn a simple idea into a two-week-long soap opera, complete with plot twists and dramatic music..
• Headline: BUYS COAST RESORT SITE.; Philadelphia and Wilmington Group Obtains Nova Scotia Area.. Impact: Buying up coastal resort sites led to a surge in property speculation, which eventually spiraled into the modern housing crisis. It's the classic tale of 'if you build it, they will come… and then they won't be able to afford it.'. Fact: Nothing says 'relaxation' quite like a fancy summer resort that was probably built on land that used to belong to a family of raccoons..
• Headline: PUBLIC WORKS CALLED BUSINESS STABILIZER; Reserve of Governmental Plans for Depressions Urged by Building Congress.. Impact: The call for public works as a stabilizer foreshadowed future government spending programs that would either save economies or send them spiraling further into debt, depending on which economist you ask.. Fact: Public works: the adult version of 'let’s build a fort out of couch cushions and pretend we're in charge of the world.'.
• Headline: Sports Today. Impact: Sports headlines have a way of creating a national obsession that distracts the masses from pressing issues, paving the way for decades of talking heads arguing about the merits of various athletic socks.. Fact: Sports: the only place where people willingly get into heated debates about jerseys, while ignoring the burning questions about our planet's future..
• Headline: EXILED POLITICIAN ADVISES ALFONSO; Spanish King Telephones to Alba in Paris for Guidance in Cabinet Crisis. FRENCH DOUBT HARMONY Paris Observers Believe Monarch Has Won Only Temporary Respite in Clash of Parties.. Impact: The advice sought by King Alfonso from an exiled politician highlights the constant tug-of-war between monarchy and democracy, setting the stage for future royal families to seek PR advice instead of political counsel.. Fact: Why ask your loyal subjects for advice when you can just call an exiled politician and pretend to care about their opinions?.
• Headline: DOEG RANKED NO.1, REPLACING TILDEN; STARS WHO WERE RANKED FIRST IN MEN'S AND WOMEN'S TENNIS AT MEETING YESTERDAY.. Impact: The ranking of tennis players has led to an ongoing saga of rivalries and sponsorship deals that has less to do with athleticism and more to do with who can sell the most overpriced tennis shoes.. Fact: Ranking players: the only sport where you can be number one, yet still be overshadowed by a celebrity's Instagram account..
• Headline: REGIONAL CULTURE.. Impact: The mention of regional culture signifies the beginning of a long and complicated love affair with local cuisines and artisanal crafts, eventually leading to the explosion of food trucks and overpriced local festivals.. Fact: Regional culture: the fancy way of saying 'we're really into this one type of pie that you probably won’t find outside our state.'.
• Headline: ANNUAL HOME SHOW SET FOR OCTOBER; Official Sees Growing Demand for Improved Type of Family Dwellings.. Impact: The annual home show not only sparked the DIY craze but also inadvertently led to a never-ending cycle of home renovation shows that have convinced everyone they can be their own interior designer—spoiler alert: they can’t.. Fact: Home shows: where dreams of a perfect home meet the reality of a half-finished basement and a mountain of debt..