JUNE 4, 1930

Full News Archive

• Headline: Miss Perkins Defends Compensation Bureau. Impact: Miss Perkins' valiant defense of the Compensation Bureau led to a series of increasingly bizarre court cases where workmen claimed their injuries were actually caused by 'bad vibes' from their employers, thus creating the first 'emotional workers' compensation' cases in history.. Fact: Despite her defense, Miss Perkins later became the poster child for the 'Unions Are Just a Bunch of Picky Babies' movement. Ironically, it didn't catch on..
• Headline: Surge in Radio Sales Reported. Impact: The rise in radio sales marked the beginning of a world where people would argue over which radio station had the best music, leading to decades of terrible taste in tunes. Thanks a lot, 1930!. Fact: This was also the start of people's obsession with radios, which eventually led to the invention of the 'talking toaster'—because who wouldn't want their breakfast to chat?.
• Headline: Students Hitch-Hike by Plane in 1930. Impact: The audacious move of hitch-hiking in planes prompted a wave of adventurous spirits who later took up extreme sports like sky-surfing and competitive cloud-gazing, ultimately leading to a bizarre trend of sky-based reality shows.. Fact: These students were later celebrated as the first 'Airborne Millennials,' although they didn't have Instagram to document their 'epic' journey. Tragic..
• Headline: ARGENTINE PAPER HAILS COMMERCIAL CONGRESS; Meeting at Sacramento, Cal., Is Seen as Forerunner of Better Relations.. Impact: The praise for the Pan-American Commerce Conference inadvertently inspired a series of awkward international handshakes that would foreshadow the global awkwardness of future diplomatic summits.. Fact: Back in the day, 'better relations' meant sending fruit baskets instead of angry tweets. How quaint!.
• Headline: ROOSEVELT MEMORIAL IS FINALLY APPROVED; Trustees Act on Plans for Wing of American Museum, Which Will Be Opened in 1932.. Impact: The approval of the Roosevelt Memorial spurred a nationwide debate on whether future memorials should be made of recycled materials, leading to the infamous 'Trash to Treasure' movement.. Fact: The 1932 opening was such a big deal that some people mistook it for a concert, only to be sorely disappointed when no one played guitar..
• Headline: WIDOW SAYS OFFICIAL WAS TAKER OF BRIBES; She Sues in Berlin for Money Placed in Banks Under Another's Name.. Impact: The widow's lawsuit opened the floodgates for a series of courtroom dramas that would eventually inspire a genre of poorly written soap operas centered around rich widows seeking revenge.. Fact: In hindsight, this widow should've just started a true crime podcast instead. She would've made a killing—pun intended..
• Headline: MOSCOW REDS OPEN PARTY CONFERENCE; Battles of Grand Communist Convention to Be Waged in Advance at District Session. KULAK'S DOOM REASSERTED But Kremlin Rejects "Liquidation" of New Urban Bourgeois-- Stalin's Critics in 3 Groups. The Kremlin Policy. "Full Speed Ahead.". Impact: The Moscow Reds' party conference set off a chain reaction of secretive meetings that would eventually lead to the invention of the 'conspiracy theory' as we know it, proving that even in politics, paranoia pays off.. Fact: Stalin's critics argued about 'liquidation' while sipping vodka, which honestly sounds like a pretty fun party, minus the whole 'doom' vibe..
• Headline: RUSSIANS FLEE TO TURKEY.; With 40 Georgians, 300 of Them Push Toward Istanbul.. Impact: The mass exodus of Russians to Turkey led to a strange cultural exchange where Turkish cuisine was oddly influenced by Russian culinary traditions, resulting in the infamous 'Vodka Baklava' fusion dish.. Fact: Historians believe this was the first instance of people fleeing to a country for the food—long before Yelp made it cool..
• Headline: VAUSE IS CLEARED IN FINANCING DEAL; Kings Grand Jury's Decision on Operations of Capital Company Displeases Brower. ACTION ON ESTATE STARTS Surrogate Orders Judge to Show Why He Should Not Account for $63,000 Property. Jury Sits Six Hours. Collins Hearing Delayed.. Impact: Vause's clearing in the financing deal sparked a series of scandalous headlines that inspired a whole generation of financial thrill-seekers to push the boundaries of what constituted 'legal' in business.. Fact: This case was so convoluted that even the court reporters needed therapy after trying to decipher it..
• Headline: 24 ARE GRADUATED BY MARINE ACADEMY; Cadets of State Course Now Are Eligible for Examination for Merchant Service.. Impact: The graduation of 24 cadets from the Marine Academy instigated a rush toward military careers that would eventually lead to a bizarre trend of military-themed reality TV shows, showcasing their 'real-life' struggles.. Fact: Legend has it, one of the cadets went on to invent the 'Marine Academy Survival Guide,' which consisted mostly of tips on how to avoid actual survival situations..