JANUARY 9, 1930

Full News Archive

• Headline: International Good-Will Talks Begin. Impact: The series of good-will talks led to an unexpected global trend of diplomats becoming influencers, forever changing the landscape of international relations to include hashtags and selfies.. Fact: Imagine if diplomats had TikTok back then – we could've avoided a few world wars with viral dance challenges instead!.
• Headline: Historic Art Auction of Oil Paintings. Impact: One of the paintings sold was a long-lost masterpiece that funded an art revolution, leading to the rise of modern art and the birth of existential crises among art critics.. Fact: Old paintings: the only thing that appreciates faster than your average real estate market… unless, of course, you try to sell your family heirloom..
• Headline: FIVE PUT ON TRIAL IN LEAD STOCK SALE; Accused With 3 Corporations of Defrauding Investors in $1,000,000 Deals. THEIR METHODS EXPLAINED Prosecutor Charges That Only One Shipment of Ore Was Made by the Utah Concern. Says $649,000 Was Received. Defends the Transactions.. Impact: This trial ignited a wave of stock market regulations that eventually led to the creation of financial advisors, who now charge you an arm and a leg to tell you not to invest in anything that sounds too good to be true.. Fact: When it comes to stock sales, remember: if it sounds like a scam, it probably is. But hey, at least they didn’t take your life savings… this time..
• Headline: STARTS FOR DATA ON FOCH.. Impact: The effort to design a memorial for Marshal Foch led to the creation of an entire genre of war memorials, getting the ball rolling for future generations to contemplate their own legacies, often while scrolling through Instagram.. Fact: Marshal Foch: the only person who could get a memorial designed without having to deal with the modern-day headache of permits and zoning laws..
• Headline: CHEVROLET HOST TO 2,200.; Klingler Outlines "Biggest Selling Campaign" to Dealers.. Impact: This meeting set the stage for the automotive marketing frenzy that would lead to the eventual rise of car commercials featuring catchy jingles that get stuck in your head for weeks.. Fact: In a world of marketing, just remember: the bigger the sales campaign, the more likely it is you’ll be inundated with car ads while trying to watch your favorite show..
• Headline: SERVICE FOR W.J. CURTIS JR.; Yachtsman Killed in Auto Crash Is Buried in Rye.. Impact: The tragic death of W.J. Curtis Jr. led to increased safety regulations in both boating and automotive industries, ultimately saving countless lives but also ruining a few good parties.. Fact: Yachtsman or not, no one wants to be buried in a place called Rye – it sounds like a bad gluten allergy waiting to happen..
• Headline: GROUP NAMED TO SEEK NEW FEDERAL BUILDING; Business Men and Civic Workers Will Try to Bring Federal and City Governments Into Accord.. Impact: The endless quest for a new federal building caused a bureaucratic chain reaction that resulted in more meetings than actual buildings being built, proving once again that paperwork is the real winner in government.. Fact: If you think finding a new federal building is hard, try navigating the labyrinth of city bureaucracy – it’s like an escape room, but way less fun..
• Headline: 4,500 Battle in Museum to See Einstein Film; Police Quell Stampede After 8 Guards Fail. Impact: This chaotic stampede marked the dawn of science becoming a blockbuster phenomenon, leading to an era where even the most boring subjects could be turned into must-see movies, complete with popcorn.. Fact: Who knew that watching a film about relativity could cause more chaos than a Black Friday sale? Next time, bring your own guards!.